Monday, May 7, 2007

Rejoice! All You Evil Vegetarians

Monday is when my critique group meets every week and tonight marks a sad day for me. For the first time in about three years I will not be bringing any pages of my own. Not because I'm a slacker, I actually finished about twenty five or thirty pages this week, I just don't feel good about the majority of what I wrote this week.

I'm not talking about the typos, or myriads of punctuation errors, or even my atrocious grammar. I can live with someone reading my material that is laced with those types of errors. Heck, those of you who read this blog are subjected to that stuff everyday. I'm talking content, voice, and just plain lackluster storytelling. Now I have taken material to crit only to find out the story is working near as well as I imagined. My group has picked apart a character or two and moaned over a weak plot, but luckily not lately. They still offer a ton of valuable help, but usually we are talking about fine tuning a character not an entire makeover. Anyway I don't feel comfortable enough with this one POV character (yes, its that pesky teenage girl) to unleash her on the world so my streak will end tonight.

Changing the subject, i went tot he doctor this morning to hear my results on some bloodwork I had done a couple of weeks ago. Now anybody that knows me has heard me say, Lettuce is the devil. so is broccoli, bean sprouts, carrots, beets, spinach, and just about everything else plant that people eat. I don't do vegetables. I am a carnivore, with a bit of bread thrown in.

For years people have told me. One of these days your diet is gonna catch up to you. You cholesterol must be out of this world. You're going ti keel over with a heart attack before you forty.

Okay all at once let me hear it -- I TOLD YOU SO.

Feel better now. My good cholesterol was too low and now I have some nice new pills to take every night. My blood sugar was too high and my doctor directed me to lost 55 pounds. Yes, you read that right FIFTY-FIVE as in the same number Sammy Hagar shouted that he couldn't drive. Right now I tip the scales at 275 sow e are talking about nearly one-fifth of my body weight. I'm gonna try and lost some weight, but don't expect to see me chomping on celery stick anytime soon. Think I'll go on the all beef jerky diet.

Anybody got any suggestions that doesn't involve a bowl of lettuce?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Need you consult the nurse whose number is probably on the speed dial?

I'm here and with tons of knowledge and I won't even say those words...I told you so.

Me

Anonymous said...

VegetariansAreEvil.Com